My Reflections: 10 Things I've Learned in 10 Years!

Good Evening everybody,

I hope all is well with everybody and you're all taking care of yourselves. This past couple of weeks has been pretty difficult for us as a family, something that you should know about us is that we adore dogs. Any breed, size, age, ailment or temperament, we will take them all and this week our beloved Bullmastiff dog Bella passed away, my whole family is devastated obviously, and we all need some time to get over it because she was simply amazing and she was like a person in a dog's form.  I've also started back at university and I'm properly in the swing of things now, looking forward to assignments and praying as hard as I can to avoid drama but that's clearly not working at the moment haha!

The past couple of weeks I've been doing a lot of reflections, looking at my life, my attitude and things I've been through, I've been thinking of making some changes and looking into the possibility of maybe moving house at some point but nothing will be rushed. So, all of that reflections led me to think about everything I have learned form my experiences and wow was I surprised to say the least! We go about our daily lives spilling out the wisdom we've learned to people who need it, want it or who just will listen to it but we never really stop to think "where did that come from?" or "what led me to this?". Therefore I would like to share some of the rings I've learned with you and maybe some experiences that led me to these points. 

It's okay to have no clue what you want to do with your life - This can be an issue for a lot of people to be honest and I've had friends and ex-friends who simply have no idea what they want or can do with their qualifications and experiences but to some extent that's okay. There are people with numerous degrees who still have no idea what they want to do, but sometimes if you just take it a day at a time and just try and enjoy what you're doing as you do it then things will usually fall into place. I must say if you don't enjoy whatever it is that you're doing then you need to leave it, even if that's a relationship or a job just get out because life is far too short to waste being unhappy. 

Not having a boyfriend/girlfriend in school, college or uni isn't the worst thing - For many people this can be pretty much a confidence killer, just as being virgin through school or not going to any crazy parties can make you feel like a loser, not having a boyfriend/girlfriend throughout school can be a major confidence killer. It's not the be all and end all of everything though, think of it this way the more time you spend swooning over a guy/girl the more you are doing yourself a disservice, you would be focusing on YOU! Learning your own boundaries, finding new and fun hobbies, time with friends and family, working harder at school and getting better grades is an amazing achievement. Also most people in school who say they have a BF/GF that they love will likely split up as they aren't mature enough* at that point to hold a relationship down AND those people saying they have lots of awesome sex... yeah? No, they usually aren't and even if they were nobody is amazing at sex the first time they have it, so stop worrying!

Me being a happy and semi-confident person!

Staying true to yourself makes you a much happier person - I can't say much about this one as it is what it says on the can. If you are true to yourself and take part in the things that you like, if you hang around with the people you love, listen to good music, watch awesome movies and wear the soothes you are comfortable in then you will have a much better life, nobody wants to be stuck in clothes they can't stand, listening to God-awful music with people they don't get on with do they? Exacly! I actually learned this when I hit 18 because I had been trying so so hard to fit in at college with the girls in my class and I just kind of realised one morning while the girls talked about sex positions, modern music I had no idea about and what they were doing at the weekend that I thought "my god I'm 18 trying to be 16 and I would be happier at home this weekend with a book, completed coursework, candles on an laughing with my Mam and Nana" so that's what I did and I was totally bloody happy with it!

Making time for friends and family, even if you're super busy or stressed, is usually **always worth it - I included this one because a few weeks ago I met up with my oldest and greatest friend Leanne (Leanne, if you're reading this I still can't believe we have been friends for 10 years!). She signed herself up for the 3 years of gruelling mental torture known as university, although our courses are very different we do know, and anyone else who tries super hard to do well at uni, that uni takes up a high amount of our time and can be difficult to arrange get togethers but she told me that she always made times for her friends and family which is something I struggled with, if i have work that usually comes first so I don't stress about it, but lately I've been arranging more time out with friends, family and  generally just for myself too because honestly it's a welcomed break away, the work isn't going anywhere but time with friends and family is so precious.

People are cruel/assholes/ignorant... at EVERY age - Can't express how many times I want you to read and re-read that back because it's so true, there are so many nasty, cruel people out in that work that it's impossible to shield yourself away from them so growing a thick skin is essential, I'm still working on mine so I am in no position to preach at all but my God what I have definitely helps! Nastiness and childish behaviour doesn't stop at a particular age, it isn't just reserved for children, some of the most digesting comments I've ever received have been from young and older adults... Imagine a child's vocabulary with more swears basically. This kind of this does need to be ignored if it's nothing too serious but discrimination and ignorant comments need report in in the right circumstances such as at work or in a public situation if there is anyone available to report it to. Keep yourself right and safe at all times thought. Also as a side note to this one, if you have friends then they, even after a long time and lots of memories can still turn their backs on you and vice versa. 

Believing in your own strength and abilities is essential if you want to do anything in this world - This one for me, is pretty much the follow on the the above point, hence the structure of this post. If you are going to meet assholes at every stage in your life then you're going to meet barriers to what you're wanting to do, you'll need to overcome barriers and fight for what you think is right. A recent problem with my consultant who diagnosed my POMC has fought me this mores than ever; if you spend your whole life thinking that you can't do something or that you're not good enough then that's all you will ever be because you will never go outside of your comfort zone or gain confidence. If, however, you work hard and believe that you can be do something, even if it is as simple as talking to someone over the phone to order something or ask something then you have taken that step to increasing you confidence, each time you do that it will get easier, you will know that you can talk to someone on the phone and then on to the next challenge it is! If you think that you do have the strength to carry on when you're having a stressful day then you will get through it and getting into bed at night will be much sweeter. 

Money has no meaning outside of its purpose - I like this one. In fact this one is my favourite because it took me longest to realise to be frank. I didn't have many friends throughout school, the ones I did (excluding a couple) were pretty shitty and made my life hell most of the time, but I was so scared of being alone that I would spend a huge amount of the money I received in trying to buy their affection. I would take them on days out, buy them whatever they wanted, make sure if they didn't have enough money I would give it to them. I have needed fuel money to take friends places and asked for help if they took me out of my way but when they didn't help I let it go because hey that's money they could spend on themselves and I'll manage somehow... But the thing is money has 0 value if it's not being used for its original purpose which is to purchase goods, so all of that money I spent on "friends" didn't miraculously help improve our relationship, it just meant they took advantage of me and some of my friends are still doing that now just not necessarily with money but emotional support. The friends and people that mattered didn't care if I had no money at all, we could have a day in the house baking or cross-stitching or reading or even just sitting in silence and that was enough. I wish I'd known that earlier. 

Working hard always pays off in some way - I promise that this is true! If you work hard at something, even if you're rubbish at it then it'll pay off somehow, it might just pay off because you feel good about yourself for working hard but it definitely pays off, and working hard at something will give you a sense of achievement which in turn definitely helps building confidence and self-esteem!

Nothing comes before your health - This is something that I learned far too late in life. Something to know about me is that I went to an absolutely awful comprehensive school, the pupils there were evil, the teachers sub-par and didn't care about anything that was going on. I remember that after being diagnosed with POMC when I first started comprehensive school that my parents got a nurse form the RVI into school to explain to the class and teachers what exactly was wrong with me, one fact being that I would need to eat regularly and drink more, one rule in our school was no drinking in class so I remember getting my water bottle taken away from me and one particular teacher ripped up my toilet pass (a card that lets you go to the toilet whenever you need, no questions asked). My Mam went up to the school and went crazy with the teachers after that because by the time I got home I had held my need to use the toilet so long that a couple of days late i developed a kidney infection and I was so dehydrated I couldn't talk properly. It was then (in year 10 when I was around 15) that I literally vowed never ever to let somebody get me into that situation because no 60 minute lesson about WW2 is more important than my health. The same goes for you, nothing is ever more important than your health, so if you're very ill, mentally needing  break or physically unable to do anything then you have to take that time away, schedule it in if you have to to make sure you get everything done that you need doing but always make sure you have good health because you can't do very much without that on your side. 

You have got to think of yourself - For a lot of people this can be pretty difficult myself included because some people have a natural instinct to look after other people before themselves. I suppose that this point is the accumulation of all of the other points all rolled into 7 seemingly unimportant words. I don't mean that you should take being selfish to the extremes but I do mean that in everybody's life there comes a time when you simply have to put yourself first. There are so many reasons people can choose to put themselves first, some people do it when they're sad, others when they're angry or stressed or distressed or happy; I find that putting yourself first should be a running theme throughout your life, it should involve self-care and support; I put myself first by not allowing people to take advantage of me the way I used to and taking time to get to know my limits and boundaries so that I can stop people getting in the way of my happiness, if someone is going to cause upset or difficulties in my life then get rid of them because like I said at the beginning... life is simply too short. 

Our gorgeous Belle <3

So, there we have it, those are the 10 most important things I've learned in 10 years (from 12 years old to 22) and I hope you guys have really enjoyed reading this post because I loved writing it! Please come back next time and have an awesome week until then! As silly as it may seem to some, I am dedicating this post to our beautiful dog Bella Savage who passed away 08.02.2018, she really was the best friend a person could hope for and she will be more then missed. 

Love, Katy xo

My Journey to Self-Love and Body Positivity

SASSY PUG!

Hey all, this post has been coming for a while because it's something that's very close to my heart and a topic I've struggled with for years on end. Body positivity. 

Every singe day in college I'll hear a girl I walk past say "oh I'm so fat, I've got to lose weight!" or a guy say "I really need to get myself to the gym, I'm not strong enough yet", both of those things I actually heard within the same two hour period at my college from students. Things like this break my heart because I have had difficulty with body positivity for almost all of my life and knowing that others are feeling the same way I did as a child doesn't bear thinking about. 

As a child I was bullied from Nursery (age 3 or 4) right up to last December age 18, I personally used to think I deserved every bit of bullying I got, I was ugly, fat, disgusting, all of these things I would remind myself of on a daily basis to make the bullying more understandable. At least that way I knew why I was being bullied, I thought that bullying was a punishment because other people had to look at my horrid face, my fat stomach and my huge thighs. I pushed friends away, withdrew from my family and let my school work slide round about the age of 13/14 when I started self-harming and became suicidal because the bullying was getting worse but because I was maturing I was starting to understand that the bullies were nothing but children who targeted my weak spots... it worked but still, at least I was maturing enough to know it. 

In school I had very few friends, only two I can think of that I would consider true friends, these friends weren't always nice to me but I passed the majority of the things off as friends taking the piss. After several suicide attempts, more self-harm, and God knows how many nights I'd cried myself to sleep or whatever, at 16 things started to change and this is how. 

I walked into a shop and went straight to the magazine isle, I LOVED women's magazines but this day I had seen so much on the TV about how large the average woman was getting, how they used to look, accounts on Twitter making highly offensive fat jokes, insensitive parents using "tough love" to make children lose weight and I had had enough. So, when I saw the typical magazine article where a clinically underweight celeb put on enough wight to be considered healthy, the magazine branded them the worst word possible... FAT *DUN DUN DUUUUUNN*

I laughed to myself, I'd taken these articles as gospel as a child, but how can anybody take something seriously where medical advice and medical opinions are given by journalists? Girls are made to feel bad by inaccurate medical and health opinions given by someone who works in a completely different field! It sounds daft but that was my turning point. From that day I stopped picking up those magazines that made me feel awful about myself. 

I still had issues with how I looked obviously so I thought it was time to address them and I did it my getting dressed every morning and saying one nice thing about myself, even if I didn't mean it, it did feel great to have said something nice. I remember one day I got to the bathroom mirror and without thinking, without having to remind myself to do it I said "Wow, I look so cute today!" and I meant it, that was the best feeling I've ever experienced. Obviously that wasn't the only thing that I used to boost my body confidence, I'm on instagram and I follow accounts such as Tess Munster (Holliday now I believe), Body Positivity, I look at and absolutely love the Carol Rosetti drawings. When you're trying to build up your body confidence and trying to love yourself for who you are I can't lie to you, it's a difficult and long road, picture a turtle trying to walk up a steep hill that's covered in peanut butter on a hot summer day. That's how difficult it is, however in this day and age the media including social media also push it down our throats not to fat shame or skinny shame but each day girls and boys are told they need to be skinny, they need to be strong, muscular, curvy is bad, a bit of a belly is a sin and god forbid you get labeled as fat because they make out your life is over! Well I will tell you something for nothing, your life in never over unless you allow it to be! Whether you're fat, skinny, middle, wobbly or green you have a life, you are valued and you are BEAUTIFUL. I'm a plus size blogger, I'm fat, my clothes go above a size 18 and I am actually healthy. I have the best friends a girl could wish for, I'm enjoying college and I'm on my way to getting my ideal career, I have the most wonderful family anybody could ever dream of and most importantly I truly do love the person I am. 

For all of you girls and boys struggling with anything body related make a list of things you're good at, things you know, things you like, what you want to do and who you want to be. After all, if a person has good thoughts they are beautiful. 

I wish all of you the best of luck of any of you are wanting to start your journey to self-love and body positivity.

Love Katherine. 

My Ultimate Life Goals!

Hey All!

Lately a lot of of things have been going on in my life that have lead me to rethink things, what I want to do, who i need in my life and so on; blogging is a great way for me to get my thoughts in to some sort of logical, sensical order, so this is why I’m doing my ultimate life goals post. I’ve never been the type of girl who dreamed of being famous, I never wanted fortune, flashy houses, or loads of fans falling at my feet. When I was a young whipper snapper I didn’t even want to be a princess *shock horror*. I wanted to be a genius, maybe a great pianist or be fantastic at playing clarinet, I just wanted what everyone wants; to be able to live normally and earn a good wage in a job I love. Obviously the genius thing hasn’t worked out so far but I’m doing great in what I’ve chosen to do and my ultimate life goals have changed so much over the years i can’t even attempt to plan anything or set any goals in stone because nobody knows what life will throw at you. So, after a long an arduous introduction on my part (sorry for that) These are my, current, ultimate life goals!

Get through University with a decent grade - I think this is pretty common goal for most students at uni, I've given up on trying to be the A* student mainly because I'm pretty atrocious when it comes to exams. Unless my uni course is going to be all coursework like a BTEC course I'll be over the moon coming out with a C grade to be honest! 

Financial Indepencende - This is something I've always wanted, I hate the thought of having to depend on a partner or family member for financial support, from being young this has always been one of my main life goals. I think it's also important to note that finding a job that I love is very high on my priorities list, I spent so much time hating school and sixth form that I do not want to hate the job I end up with. Regardless of pay, in most circumstances, it's more important to find a job I love than anything else but for the moment I'm enjoying my college course and flip flopping between jobs I might want.

Get Married - I think it would be absolutely wonderful to find someone, fall in love and get married; it's not an essential life goal for me but it's more of a 'ideal world' type goal. Also one of the other main reasons I'd love to get married would be purely to plan the wedding because I LOVE event planning. 

Have Children - This is a top of my priorities list to be quite honest. From being very young myself I've always been  quite maternal, always known I'd make a good mother and as I've gotten older I've only gotten more sure that I definitely want children at some point. I'm also quite resolved about the fact that at least one (preferably my first) of my children should be adopted, I've very strong opinions on adoption but that's a matter for another post. So children are definitely a priority. 

Be Happy - Finally the only think I would really like in life (other than children) would be to be happy. Happiness is so important in life and life without it isn't worth a damn if you ask me. I want to get out there and do fun things, spend time with family and good people, take impromptu road trips, dance sing and generally live. Being happy is my main focus and priority at the moment and I believe more people need to make the effort to be happy, see the goodness, fun and positivity in life more often. 

Thanks for reading everybody and I really hope you enjoyed this post. Let me know some of your life goals, I’d love to hear from you!

Love Katherine. X

Happy Valentines Day!

Image from Google

Hello my lovelies!

Well, Valentines Day has finally arrived, don't worry guys and girls, after today you won't have to worry about running around for last minute presents for your significant other until February 13th next year ;) I've heard so many people today complain about how awful Valentines day is if you're single but I disagree strongly with them. Valentines day isn't made special because you have a partner, it's special because there is somebody in your lives that you love, celebrate that!

It's really important to remember that you can be your own Valentine! You're all awesome and deserve to love yourselves so for all of you single people out there (myself included) have a bloody brilliant Valentines with your friends and family, I've spent mind going out for a lovely meal with a friend and checking out the Italian waiter in the restaurant which was oodles of fun. I've also danced around my room singing my favourite songs and I plan on going to see another friend later... it's the simple pleasures in life that make it wonderful, so they say. In all seriousness if you're single today just enjoy yourself like you would any other day, you deserve it!

For all you couples out there, treat yourselves and each other and have a fab day (and night for you saucy couples *wink wink*). 

Happy Valentines day my lovely readers! 

Love Katherine. X

The Book Tag! A.K.A The Ultimate Book Tag!

Hi All!

I found this tag on books with bite and because, as many of you already know, I am a MASSIVE bookworm I jumped at the chance to have a go at this myself, I've always loved books and I adore blogging about books so I hope reading this post will be as fun for you as writing it was for me! 

Do you get sick while reading in the car?

No not at all, in fact if I'm not driving and I have even a short journey I will definitely take a book and read it for as long as I possibly can. That's one of the worst things about being able to drive yourself, you don't get the pleasure of reading in a car any more. 

Which Authors writing styles completely unique to you and why?

Regardless of the fact that I adore the series I do have to say Derek Landy, there is something about his writing that can build up tension exactly when it's needed, he can make me cry and laugh out loud no matter how many times I've read his books. I've literally been in public and laughed out loud at the sarcastic witticism his characters come out with. Plus his characters are utterly loveable, even the villains have something appealing about them. 

Harry Potter series or Twilight Saga? Give three Points to support your answer!

Harry Potter series... Always. 

1) J.K. Rowling is really detailed with her descriptions so I can see everything really clearly in my mind's eye.

2) Peeves! 

3) Snape and Lilly, need I say more?

Do you carry a book bag, if so what's in it? Excluding books

Currently my book bag is a cream canvas book bag that says 'I bloody love books' which is so true! It currently has in it the books I'm reading, those being Skulduggery Pleasant Kingdom of the Wicked, my headphones and iPod, some feminine necessities, my inhaler and my purse. That's about it, I only take what I absolutely need in my bags.

Do you smell your books?

Of course! One of my favourite smells in the world is a book, old or new the smell is just so comforting and homely and I love it. That and Prada candy perfume are my two favourite smells. 

Books with or without little illustrations?

I can read books with or without little illustrations but I tend to think if they do have little illustrations that they give the book a bit more character. I like the illustrations and revel in them when I find a book that has them in. 

What book did you love while reading but later discovered it wasn't quality writing?

For me it had to be Fifty Shades of Grey, I read all three books within 5 days and honestly whilst I was reading them I thought "wow yeah! That's some quality writing, the plot is great!"... That was when the first books came out, since then I've read many other books such as The Fault in Our Stars (John Green), The Mall (S.L. Grey and Letter To My Daughter (Maya Angelou) and I've realised how wrong I was, the writing is shoddy, tacky and the whole plot seems like a bored housewife's boring daydream. Sometimes I think I could have written a better book with more passion and fire that that and as I've mentioned before I'm not a good writer. 

Do you have any funny stories involving books from your childhood?

I don't have any funny stories from my childhood although about 6 months ago I went into Waterstones in Durham city and bought a few books including a couple of Stephen King books and John Green books and a cute guy commented on my good purchases and I ended up attempting to flirt outrageously with him until I dropped all my books on my toe and swore rather loudly, thankfully he flashed me a gorgeous grin and helped pick up the books he was only a couple years older than me but I swear my heart skipped a beat once I'd gotten over the initial mortification. 

What is the thinnest book on your shelf?

The thinnest book on my chef by far is Maya Angelou's Letters To My Daughter, this book is absolutely wonderful and warms my heart every time I read it. 

What is the thickest book on your shelf?

The thickest book on my shelf is probably The Complete Adventures of Sherlock Holmes by Arthur Conan Doyle. I only read these books in 2014 and I've never gotten into book so quickly as I got into those, Doyle was a fab writer with an eye for deduction and logic. 

Do you write as well as read? Do you see yourself as being an author in the future?

I would LOVE to be a writer but I'm honestly not very good at it, I'm quite good at writing short stories and I do that occasionally but I'm much more of a reader than a writer, there's nothing better than getting lost in a good book. 

When did you get into reading?

When I was round about 3 I started to read fluently, I remember when I was at nursery I hated reading because I got so upset that everyone else was reading but I felt like I was getting nowhere so I came home one day and just cried to my grandma because I couldn't read and I really wanted to. I was such a cute child. Who am I kidding, I'm still cute. :)

What is your favourite classic book?

Mary Shelley's Frankenstein is one of my absolute favourites without a doubt! I first read this in year 10 and usually when I'm told to read a book, like for a book report or something, I struggle to get into it as I like to find my own books to read but this book just grabbed me right away. I have no idea why as it was't particularly fast paced or action packed but it's a very good book that I'd recommend to anyone. 

In school was your best subject English?

English wasn't actually, I hated English language but that's all we id up until year 10 when we finally started English literature which obviously I loved! We were made to read To Kill a Mockingbird, Frankenstein, The Strange Case of Dr Jeckyll and Mr Hyde and another book I can't remember, it was a really good lesson. 

If you were given a book as a gift that you'd read and hated what would you do?

Personally I always believe that if I'm given a book I don't like there will always be someone out there who will appreciate it or enjoy it therefore I will give them to whomever I think the book suits. 

What's a lesser known series that you know of that's similar to Harry Potter/Hunger Games?

The only series I can think of is the Percy Jackson series! I adore those and I've even gotten my mother into reading them to ha! I love anything like Harry Potter although I have to admit I simply can't get into the Hunger Games, maybe I'll try again later this year.

Are you a nerd, dork or dweeb?
All of the above... or so I've been called numerous times. I like to think of myself as a nerd. 

What's your favourite word?

Scintillating. I love that word and I have no idea why, it's just fun to say and fun to read. I will provide you with scintillating conversation... most times anyway.

Vampires or fairies? Why?
As a main character I like vampires, mainly because I find they're more versatile characters to work with and read about but in general I like fairies... because they're cute.

Shapeshifters or angles? Why?
I think shapeshifters are really cool and in a book my attention is immediately grabbed by a shapeshifter, one example of that is the aminagi in the Harry Potter books. Not sure if I've spelled that correctly but whatever. 

Spirits or werewolves? Why?
Werewolves definitely. I've always been intrigued by werewolves, they're pretty damn cool.

Zombies or vampires?
I like zombies, I love zombie books and I'll always go for a zombie movie or book if I'm looking for a scare, mainly because I have a terrible and irrational fear of zombies...

Love triangle or forbidden love?

Never forbidden love for me, usually with forbidden love I find that the books are very brooding or sullen and I can't stand reading books like that, I'm not keen on love triangles but as long as there is a happy ending or there is romance of some sort in a book, even if that love never comes to fruition, that's a good romance story for me. 

Full on romance books or action packed with a few love scenes mixed in?
Personally I like a mix, if a book has too much romance going on it can take away from the initial plot line itself but if a writer is leaving their readers hanging when they want to see some romance going on their readers can get frustrated with too much action. I think you've got to find a book with the right balance and it's important to note that just because there isn't romance in a book doesn't mean it can't be jam packed with love.

A few books I got for Christmas

Love Katherine. X

3 Things I Like About Myself and 3 Things I Don't

Credit to Effyourbeautystandards on Instagram

This post is a kind of follow on from yesterday's Advice to My Younger Self post, that post was very personal to me as it addressed some of the issues I've faced in the past however, I would like to keep a theme of body positivity and self acceptance going on my blog for as long as possible as I feel it's really very important to spread a vibe of body confidence to everyone. Therefore I'm going to write a post on 3 things I like about myself and 3 things I'm not too keen on, I've only written three of each because I have an assignment for college and I'm rather pushed for time, so lets get down to it, enjoy everyone!

I LIKE: I really love my eyes, they're such a lovely combination of colours, my eyes start as a very dark green around the outside or the iris and they gradually get a lighter green until theres a light yellow right around the pupil area. Also because of my eye colour I really suit browns, golds and creams in eyeshadow shades which I love to wear anyway so... bonus!

I DON'T LIKE: I really don't like how much of a stress head I am. If I could change anything about myself I would honestly say that I would change how I handle stress. I've always stressed over little things, even things like what book I'm going to read next, so big things like life decisions tend to be daunting times for me purely because of how high my stress levels go. My best friend is so laid back and I really envy her for that, I'm currently in the process of finding ways to relax when I' stressed and so far I've found gallons of tea and cross stitching works rather well. 

I LIKE: I like how sensible I can be, a lot of the time when I was younger I was really insecure about being so different from other girls my age, I was never into going out drinking or staying out on school nights and I think because of that I was able to look at the culture of people my age in a different way, I was able to spend more time on getting good grades and having nights in with my friends when we were free to do so. 

I DON'T LIKE: I don't like my my eye sight, I mentioned above that I really like my eyes, well I don't like how my eyes work... or don't. I have pretty bad eyesight and I can't really take my glasses off without bumping into something or falling over, I would love to have better eyesight. 

I LIKE: I absolutely love my boobs! This might be too much information but I love my bosoms, they're pretty large and have been since I was young. They've always made me feel really feminine, womanly and when I find a bra that actually fits and they're in a good top I can't help but feel really good about myself because I've found that having melons my size also really helps to accentuate my waist and hips, both of which I also love!

I DON'T LIKE: I'm not too keen on my feet but then again I'm not keen on anybody's feet so technicallyI don't think that should count, so I'm going to end on a positive note despite the fact that it's in the I DON'T LIKE  section. I do like myself, it was so hard to think about all the things I don't like about myself but honestly was a doodle to list 5 or even 10 things that I like about myself and that's because I've finally learned to love myself and my flaws not in spite of my flaws because my flaws are part of what makes me, well... fabulous ME!

I hope more people out in the world will learn to love themselves because no matter who you are I genuinely believe that you deserve to love yourself!

Love Katherine. X

Advice to My Younger Self: Things I've Realised

A young me with with the grandparents on our jollies

This post is my second post of they day and it's going to be a pretty personal one, I've been doing a lot of soul searching these past few weeks and I think it's about time I put my thoughts into physical(ish) form. Over the years I've struggled with quite a few things such as body issues, long term medical and health issues self esteem/confidence and bullying. I never was the sort of person to stand up for myself and take charge of my own life... until now. Over the course of my life I've completely changed as a person, as a woman, I'm confident, I'm funny and to be rather honest I'm an all round fabulous lady and all of those bullies, those people who've tried to put me down, they've failed miserably because right now I couldnt be happier, I've learned quite a lot in my short life but I've only just realised most of it. This post is basically me, the strong and confident woman I am now, telling my scared, anxious younger self what's what in life. 

It's okay to be single! It's okay to love yourself too!

When I was much younger I never thought of myself as beautiful or even pretty, I thought of myself as the girl who would always be bypassed, trodden on and left alone because everyone wants to avoid the fat girl with her nose in a book. I genuinely thought I was unlovable and that being single was a cardinal sin but my GOD I was so naive! Just because I was single I thought I was less of a person, less than what all the other girls in my class were but I was so wrong! Looking back now being single in those years allowed me to focus on other things, I got good grades, I had time to spend with my best friends and have fun like any other teenager should be doing, I wasn't overly concerned with boys I was concerned with my own body issues. I was able to figure out who I am as a person because I didn't have the pressure on me to get a partner because I assumed nobody would want me! As I've gotten older I've realised how wrong I was, I've had boyfriends and such albeit not loads but the feeling of having a boyfriend is nothing compared to the feeling I get when I'm able to look into the mirror and finally say that I like... nay I love who I am as a person, of course I still have my insecurities but who doesn't?! My appearance does not define me, I have a fab personality, I'm funny, quirky and I have awesome friends. That brings me on to my second point...

The things I don't like about myself don't matter to anyone but me!

"Can you see my scar?" "Am I too pale?" "My stomach is far too big" these are the things I would cry over when I was younger. I would cry about them because I didn't like them, I thought my friends could see those insecurities, could see how awful I looked... No. Those things mattered only to me, they only mattered because I let them matter. I spent so much of my time obsessing over how I looked, crying about my appearance and what I could and couldn't wear. If I could go back in time and meet my younger self I would grab the poor girl by the shoulders and I'd make her believe that she was and is a gorgeous young lady with a personality to die for! I'd tell her to wear what the hell she wants, do whatever makes her happy and stop wasting her teenage years worrying over things that were only huge problems to her. Nowadays I do just that, I wear what makes me comfortable, I do what makes me happy (reading usually haha) and I spend time with the people I love and have a good laugh nearly every single day.

Don't try and make everyone like you!

This was a biggie for me mind. I was so scared of doing something wrong, even at home, I tried to make every single person I came across like me. This in the end became too stressful and I realised that half the people I was trying to make like me, I didn't like myself. That I realised pretty quickly in sixth form when I met a wider variety of people, you simply can't make people like you and I would have saved so much time if I'd stopped trying to do that. Now I take the mentality of - well I'm being myself so if you don't like me you're missing out - and I'm getting along just fine and dandy with that mentality. Actually I'm much more chilled out and happy since I've stopped trying to get everyone to like me.

Put yourself first! Say No!

This is something I still have a few issues with, I think that's mainly because I like to help people whenever I can though. When I was a young whipper snapper I did everything... for everyone. When I was at school I would actually do other people's work because of my inability to say no, that took up way too much of my own personal time so now if I don't want to or I can't do something I will say no. I've found out how important it is to take some time for myself, even if it's only 5 minutes listening to my favourite songs or half an hour reading. It's a great way to calm down and relax, I wish I'd had the sense to see it when I was younger. 

So all in all over the years, yeah I've struggled with stuff but so have so many other people around the world, I don't ever let that fact take away from what I feel or what I think but I've finally realised that along with going with the flow, loving and accepting myself and making sure I surround myself with positivity, life isn't always going to be as bad as it seems, it may not have turned out exactly as I planned it would when I was younger but it's much better that I ever could've imagined right now. 

Also for those of you who have body issues or are having trouble accepting yourselves I highly recommend following Tess Munster, Body Positive and the Eff Your Beauty Standards on Instagram!

Thanks for reading all and I hope you enjoyed reading it. 

Love Katherine. X